Sunday, June 26, 2011

Part 36: Day of Remebrance

The months went on and life seemed as it was before her molar pregnancy. By now, there were days when she didn't think even about it, which to her was somewhat refreshing. But she couldn't escape it completely. She continued to be monitored monthly via HCG blood testing and every once in awhile she would receive mother-to-be items in the mail. The most recent had been a box of formula. Guess I won't be needing that any time soon, she thought.

Haunting the back of her mind was her soon approaching former due date. What was she going to feel? How was she going to react? When the day finally came, it was somewhat serendipitous. Of all the days, it just so happened to occur over the weekend of her brother-in-law's wedding. She could stay preoccupied with all the wedding prep and family time, in spite of the personal underlying weight of the weekend.

The woman and her husband stayed with his family at a cabin in an area resort. The night before the wedding, the owners of the place, a husband/wife team and friends of her in-laws, stopped by for a visit. She was most impressed by the wife. The 59-year-old hostess had been diagnosed with stage four breast cancer a little over a year prior to their meeting, yet nothing but joy and laughter emanated from her lips. The woman listened intently to the cabin hostess seated in the cushioned rocker beside her who wore an infectious smile that complimented the blue and green scarf covering her chemo-stricken head.  Below her right shoulder lived a permanent port by which her chemo treatments were dispersed. She would be on chemo for the rest of her life.

The woman's eyes filled with tears as she listened to the stories of hope and peace flowing out of this dying woman. She was granted yet another fresh perspective on her situation. Upon her reflection, she thought how fortunate and thankful she was that her molar pregnancy had not turned into cancer. Things were definitely not her ideal at the moment, but they most definitely could be so much worse, and if this cancer-stricken lady could live out what life she had left with such intention and joy, how much more so could the woman?

When the busyness of the weekend died down and the woman had time to think, she allowed herself to mourn once again. But it was a hopeful mourning. She was three months negative and had three more to go before being officially declared molar pregnancy free. It was crazy to think about how much time had passed, how far she had come. Sometimes she wavered with the thought of getting pregnant again. Who in their right mind would want to live through this again?, she thought. But the idea of having a little life of her own some day overruled her fears.

Thank you, Judy, for your inspiration and example.